Sunday, November 04, 2007

How to electrocute a turkey

How To Electrocute A Turkey Recipe
Ingredients:
One crazy family
One bad oven
circuit breaker
one turkey and stuffing
Wine and/or alcohol of choice

Directions
Get out the china, the silver, etc. set a pretty table, and serve yummy food. However, my sisters and I had a tradition that bordered on the stupid, but we loved it.
First, a big breakfast.
Then, get the turkey washed, usually a hilarious event accompanied by using the sprayer at the sink, and not necessarily spraying the bird. Water fights are essential.
Second, get the bird stuffed and in the oven.
Third, all bets are off. It's time to make the most outrageous side dishes while sampling the wine that will be served with the turkey.
Usually, we are still sober by the time we serve the turkey....but it this whole thing started a long time ago...1978 or 1979....
as I write this, I think I should post this as a recipe on how to make a turkey, let me know what you think...
It was a cold, dreary Nebraska Thanksgiving. The turkey was in the oven, and our extended family was gathered in the living room, watching football. Soon, we heard a wierd noise from the kitchen... runnnngggg, runnnnngg, rrrrrrrr, brraaacckkk.....
The 3 sisters got up and ran to the kitchen to see what was going on....we were followed by all the kids (6 of them) as we streamed through the tiny kitchen door only to see sparks coming from under the oven, and feeling electricity course to our knees....we all screamed and ran BACK out the kitchen door, as the men in the family were trying to get through the door to hit the circuit breaker.
The oven fried, the turkey was removed, and dropped....it slid across the kitchen floor, half-baked. There was squealing and screaming!
Once the sparks stopped, we had to decide. What do we do? Throw the turkey out? The more enterprising of the sisters, took the bird, put it in the sink and washed it. We then took it to the basement and cooked it in the gas oven.
It is known as the year we electrocuted the turkey.
There ever after, we never made a turkey without being fortified by alcoholic beverages to anesthetize the memory of the electocuted turkey.
So get that turkey in the oven, and have some fun doing it! Don't be too serious. Disaster could strike, and what would you do??

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